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“I’m in a band” (OH DEAR)

December 12, 2010

Why is it that every man you think could be attractive – or hell, is attractive – turns out to be in a band and obsessed with/self defines with reams of obscure music that is so far from Rihanna (I love you, Rihanna), Timbaland, Missy Elliot, the Beatles, Beethoven, Brahms, Tosca and SALT n PEPA that it just hurts? Why have I encountered so many guitar obsessions over my 14 or so years of male-fancying?

Why do men think it’s attractive to pick up that hackneyed instrument of “bad romance” (thanks Lady Gaga) and strum some dull bit of folk or perhaps their own invention?

Why do they endlessly post things about “dubstep” this and “night” that and promote their websites about music and their bands and funk and what have you? Honestly, nothing is less attractive. If I’m going to be a groupie, it’s going to be for someone who is a star of stage, screen or literature.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. December 12, 2010 10:06 pm

    a) why do you say “I love you, Rihanna” she is just an artist. Sorry I think I’m a bit old and love means something else these days.
    b) perhaps the guys are not trying to sound attractive for you !
    c) if they were why would you like an invented positive ?

    Lets all stick our heads in the unreality.

  2. Valerie permalink
    December 12, 2010 11:07 pm

    Nothing freakier than when they close their eyes while they’re sing.

  3. Rachel permalink
    December 14, 2010 5:20 pm

    the closing the eyes and belting out a tune is the absolute worst. I dated a guy once (how many of these stories do we have?) who sang for me…..I think he assumed, or presumed, that I’d gush at his brilliance and talent. I could barely muster a ‘oh, that’s nice’….. needless to say, we didn’t last too long; he disappeared shortly thereafter to the island of lost men and that might be the very reason why. I think the thing is, I (we?) find myself building these guys up in my head (am I good enough? did i do something wrong? how can he like me? what did I do wrong? why am I not good enough?)…when they play the guitar, mediocre at best, it is clear as day they don’t belong on the pedestal we’ve built for them.

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